The Three Genders Are Male, Female, And Dead

The watches pass relatively uneventfully, the only peaceful part of the next – well. You’ll see. Lone Wolf is wandering about town, poking at the brush and looking for her weapon. At dawn, the now-familiar warping noise hits again, and there’s a new note Martin Luthered to the door of the tavern, for Betha. Sivoreen drew her a family tree!

The party putters about for the morning: Remi makes bread, Kaiva creeps on Lone Wolf, and Betha calls Sivoreen for advice and gets a dress as well! Sivoreen’s advice includes the fact that we will be unarmed before going into the party – magic as well as weapons. On the upside, so will most everyone else (the exceptions being the gods, so Morgaine, Andraki, and Keanvari will have their magic).

After the bread and the news, Remi goes to talk his sulking golden boyfriend out of gatecrashing. Eventually they agree that Ondelin will go be a freedom fighter during the party, and then there’s forehead kissing and then mouth kissing. Remi gives Ondy a scarf, sending Ondy into a chivalrous panic that ends with him tearing a scrap off his shirt for Remi to keep. Ah, true love.

Seru finally manages to get ahold of Knargun and ask if he has any instructions; he says her primary paladin duty is to walk out of the party alive at the end of it. Also, there will be another dwarf champion there, but he doesn’t know who or for which god.

At 4pm the tailor arrives to outfit us, and we all promptly fall in love with him. His name is Jacques, he is a tall purple elf dude, and he is perfect, and perfectly unimpressed with anything we do. We stash our weapons in Tana’s saddlebags, and then Jacques, the Tailor of the Gods, takes us to the party at long last.

The first step to any good party is completely ruining the evenings, or at least the hours, of the staff, and we proceed to do just that. They try to take Betha’s magic away, but it turns out she needs that to live, so they have to put it back, and she has to stay within 500 feet of Morgaine at all times. Remi’s magic goes, but then a bunch of souls come out of his ring and cover his arm, and the poor steward lets him keep those. Yannic’s magic just roars when the steward tries to remove it (Yannic gets to keep the magic, and also is supposed to stay near Keanvari). Fen’s magic comes out as a vine, and Seru’s comes out as a little ball. Seru then proceeds to ruin the next guy’s hour by insisting on keeping her armor and shield, as they’re religious garb. She also has to stay within 500 feet of a god. Seru keeps the key for the magic, Remi keeps the key for the weaponry.

The party splits up in the short-lived buddy system groups, but it quickly becomes clear that the tents they were originally sent to are abandoned, and everyone’s in the main party tent. Present as part of the crowd are the people we remember seeing during Kaiva’s trial. We learn that the celestial woman’s name is Onrubia, and Milktoast’s legal name is Eric Bridger.

In a moment of prime awkwardness, our merry band of people who hate the Council are invited onstage to be acknowledged. Everyone is thanked very sarcastically for their aid in the recent events, with the exception of Yannic (who gets skipped) and Seru (who gets thanked sincerely).

After the Gauntlet of Mockery is over, the party splits up, buddy system groups be damned. Fen and Andraki go for a walk in the gardens (during which Andraki tells Fen that the Scion of the Forest is like the Ultimate Ranger to Range All Ranges) and then come back inside to play Drunk Twister with Kaiva and Morthred and a bunch of other drunk anarchists. Betha takes the book back to Morgaine and has a lovely chat with her grandmother, in which she is instructed to visit her in the Feywild (the Morgaine we’re dealing with now is actually a possessed vessel) and then dismissed – she goes to watch the Drunk Twister shenans.

Remi and Seru stick to Yannic like glue, as Keanvari reminds Yannic that Kean is, in fact, created from Keanvari’s own toe, and that sort of evil toe jam doesn’t wash off. He also says that Yannic had better start being useful to Keanvari, or Keanvari’ll take back the magic his toe gave him. First job: Get him a drink. Second job: Get Andraki off the Twister mat.

After a while, it becomes clear that, while Keanvari is a terrifying terrifying person who hates Yannic, he’s not going to kill him right then and there, and Seru slips away to track down and talk to the other dwarf champion. They have a conversation about trying to keep people alive who insist on getting smashed at anarchist parties, and then show each other their holy symbols. This other dwarf is a champion for Harmur the Tyrant! What a mood killer. Except not as much as Seru thought, because she managed to find some more mood that got killed when the other dwarf introduces herself as Dossana. Klaxons blaring, Seru excuses herself and goes back to bodyguard duty.

Tune in next week to see who lives, who dies, who hooks up, and who has the mother of all hangovers in the morning.


shannon_m_allred Millie

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